I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
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