so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
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