you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
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