Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
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