I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
I think drunk me saved him in my phone as "beautiful man" to play a joke on sober me
Randomize
