i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
5am, I am wayy too drunk for this. Hookers came out of nowhere. They're like ninjas. Some poor soul got the fat one, tomorrow's going to be interesting...
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
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