Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
Randomize