When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
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