it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Randomize
