But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
I had my own version of the Hangover last night. I woke up to a disassembled Christmas tree, shit on the futon, and a hamster in the bathroom with a necklace on that said "Feed Me Bitch." I don't own a hamster. I don't know what I drank last night, but I want to do it again.
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
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