nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
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