can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
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