I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
I'm pretty sure he told me he was sterile and I told him I was on the pill. The positive pregnancy test I'm holding in my hand right now tells me that at least one of us was lying.
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
Watching her eat just hurts me
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
Nah, just stick him in a closet with some cheetos, a blunt and soda. The darkness will calm him down until Mallory can be located.
Randomize
