Everytime she opens her mouth it's like a fucking terrorist attack on my life.
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
i know it looks like there's pee in the mayo jar in the fridge but i promise it's just apple juice that wouldn't fit in the jug after i added the booze.
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
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