Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
Randomize
