what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
Ya know what's the worst? Being drunk and wanting to show someone a picture of your goddaughter but not wanting to open the pictures on your phone because the first one is of someone's dick..
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
Randomize
