Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
Randomize
