She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
I'll never forget how blunt of a wingman you were. "Excuse me, my friend wants to makeout with someone"
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
Randomize
