i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
I think people are normalizing furries
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
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