She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
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