I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
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