Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
I had to explain to the waiter that I'm not the DD because I can't drive, but as the Designated 'Make Sure No One Gets Roofied Or Hit By A Car On The Walk Home'-er, I should still get the free drinks.
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
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