guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
i'm in hospital, i have an exam in 3 hours and the man in the cubicle next to me is doing a noisy poo. this has to get better.
please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
they're like a gay fantastic four
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
Interesting fact: if you wanted to rename a guy Jeff, just tell him you only fuck Jeffs. Magically whatever name he was using is actually his middle name cause he doesn't like going by Jeff.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
