Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
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