i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
nothing like a call from your drunk grandpa at midnight on a wednesday to ask your parents if you're registered to vote...
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
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