Duck Duck Cougar?
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
Woke up backwards on a recliner
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
Weird thing is that's not the first time I've been felt up by a Santa. Happens every year
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
Randomize
