He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
Him cheating on his girlfriend resulted in a $1500 hospital bill from repeated blows to his testicles by my ass. They diagnosed his pain as "testicle trauma". Sex karma at it's finest.
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
