i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
How do you jack off and text at the same time?
On my iPhone they have an app for that
Note to Self: No matter how horny, turned on or in the moment you are, never go down on your gf after she had soccer practice.
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
Eating Doritos is not nearly as enjoyable when I'm not drunkenly feeding them to peacocks.
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
Randomize