my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
I'm pretty sure I just crapped out my pancreas. I have 2 of those, right?
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
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