dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
Randomize
