He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
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