I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize
