Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
That awkward moment when the dude you blew on camera in college friend requests you on Facebook.
Who is this?!????
That awkward moment when you think you're texting a friend the above statement, but instead you text a stranger.
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
Randomize
