More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
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