Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
I'm off the liquor
You're forefathers are ashamed of you. They didn't struggle to make it to America so that you could become a soft dick
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
Randomize
