he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
All I want is to send a text that says "i slept with someone while wearing nothing but purple argyle socks this weekend." But the only person i would send that to is you. But you already know. Because they were your socks.
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
I don't know what else is in your wedding gift, but I just pulled out a pair of handcuffs in front of her grandmother.
Also a whip and a blindfold. Don't be a bitch, enjoy it!
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Randomize
