I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
Randomize
