Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
He broke up with me by playing Lynyrd Skynyrd "Free Bird".
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
Edward fifth and chaser hands
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
Randomize
