My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
Desperation looks like a $1 bottle of vodka and warm Cuban tap water.
I lost the right to judge tonight
I gargles a mimosa for breakfast. It's gonna be a killer Monday.
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
Randomize
