If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
I'll bet she douches with gravy.
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
Randomize
