I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
Dave called me blind fucking drunk thinking he was going to die from drinking with drake bell(wtf?) saying "it's all that drake motherfucker's fault" and later proceeded to tell me "you are my twitter"
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
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