Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
SEEEEXXX PLEASE
Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
The cop asked me why my pants were around my knees when he woke me from the sink, i replied "Officer, my underwear is still on, nothing bad happened" then he nodded in acknowledgement and we carried on with the paper work.
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
Randomize
