you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
Well I can cross 'get my dick slathered in coconut oil while watching the bob's burgers porn parody' off my bucket list.
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
Randomize