Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
I believe its time to stop celebrating Thanksgiving. I've been drunk for over a week. If my liver doesn't give out, and I'm not pregnant I will truly have something to be thankful for.
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
I'm texting you the word "cockring" because I feel it hasn't been said enough throughout our friendship.
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
Honestly I was sitting in managerial accounting thinking "I really need to get my shit together and stop drinking so much wine." But when you asked I realized... it's wine. It's always a yes.
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
Randomize
