i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
I need moral support for this bender
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
Need ride home. Girls. Stolen keg. Rolling down streets. Horny girls. No condoms. Rescue needed. girls and beer in exchange for rescue and bacon?
I. Hate. You. Where are you, are said girls cute, and how did you know I bought bacon? And how does this always happen to you?
Smarter than the average bear
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
Randomize
