I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
While the bouncer was checking my purse, he found a bag of pasta noodles in it and asked me why I put them in my purse. I said to him: "So the guy knows I can cook."
This is your morning-after text courtesy of your very confused friend!! :) To discuss "what the hell were you trying to tell me last night," press 1. To laugh over your drunken antics, press 2. To pretend like none of it even happened (or to respond with concurrent confusion because you have no idea), press 3.
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
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