Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
I just baby talked my cat. While getting ready for bed... Before 10 on a Friday. I'm officially a cat lady.
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
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