yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
Girl just walked into the bar with a T-shirt that says "I'm not Irish, kiss me anyways." Target aquired.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
Randomize
