I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
there is nothing more depressing than your birth control alarm going off while you're masturbating, and realizing you've been taking pointless precautions for over a month now.
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
