Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
I woke up to you singing What Makes You Beautiful and trying to blend an avocado with vodka.
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Randomize
